Ever since I was a small boy, I’ve always thought a bit out of the norm. My parents even concidered taking me to a psychologist. That is until I started to think the way that they thought I should – until I started following the norm. That happened when I was about 14. That was also the year that the child within started disappering. Before I turned 14, I was full of life. I wanted to live forever, did well in school, and could talk to anyone. However after turning 14 my life changed, and not in a good way. My grades slipped, I became very intervorted, and my joy of life fadded. I thought about death more and more often – I just wasn’t happy.
Years later after I was out on my own, I thought I should do what I was ‘programed’ to do by my parents and society: Get a job (something to pay the bills), get married, and have kids. During my marriage I found out I had blood clots. This devastated me to find out that even though they (medical science) had found a cure to 70% of what causes blood clots, they still didn’t know how to cure my specific disease. In the long run the marriage didn’t work out and, depending on how you look at it, I didn’t have and children.
After my divorce, I moved into an Apt with a friend. It was there that I started trying to figure out why I was so unhappy. The first thing I had to do was come to terms with my disease. That took about six months – only to come to the conclusion that the pharmaceutical industry would not profit by releasing all their cures. The next topic – Why was I unhappy? After many hours, weeks, even months of deep thought, I started noticing something. The child, the one who disappeared twenty years prior, had come back. Although scared as little me was, I was happy. Thats the start of my road to Neothink.
I eventually had to move back into my parents house, but this time I was in charge of my life. I poured my emotions into drawing or writing. I would spend a few hours a day doing nothing but in deep thought. Thinking about anything and everything. About a month before I recieved my introductory letter I was in one of my deep thoughts. During that time I came up with the word New Thinking. This was a breakthrough for me to find out what made me happy. During the entire day, after coming up with ‘New Thinking’, I was literally using thoes two words. It felt as though everything was falling into place. I had put in a change of jobs and even though every interview I had ever had bothered me to go to, the one on that day put me at ease. I then recieved my introductory letter in the mail. Somehow I just knew that this was gonna answer my questions.
After recieving the first two books, and only reading about half of each, I wasn’t sure about getting any further into Neothink. During my many hours of deep thoughts, one name kept popping up in my mind – Annabelle. I originally thought this to be a name for a furture daughter. So at the time I tryed not to think any more of it. When I recieved the final letter of Miss Annabelle’s Secrets, I just knew this is what I was so despertally looking for. You see, I found out that I see life in pictures. I needed Miss Annabelle’s Secrets to be able to understand the first 2 books.
After reading about Miss Annabelle and her students and their lives and love for not only each other, but for the love of all of mankind, I have found what I was always looking for – LOVE. You have to have a deep love for yourself, something the child within has been trying to tell me. And the best way to find the love is to create values. For me I create abstract drawings for others. The look on their face brings me an over bubbling joy. It is more than any amount of words I can write. I now have love for myself, my parents (even though they live in the anticivilization), and thoes around me. The day I finished reading about Miss Annabelle, I went to work and a co-worker asked me if I got ‘lucky’. They said I was ‘glowing’. I said ‘I got lucky, just not in the way you think. I’ve finally found what I have been searching for. I AM TRUELY HAPPY.’ The child within is now growing and I’m having fun. I again want to live foreve, can talk to anyone, and more extroverited.
I thank Neothink every day for giving me the answers to so many of my questions, and for stating the facts about many other topics I believed to be false.
Thank you Neothink and Thank you Mark for sharing this exciting new world with me and so many others.